before love there was hate
by NoLove10
Summary: they're a team, work together still they battle each other. they hated each other but look out for one another. At the end they aren't much different from one another and destiny has it's own way of doing things. it should of rated M for language content but i'm paranoid so it's rated T * i really suck at summaries but read and enjoy!*
1. Chapter 1

**I don't own nikita or any of its characters. Dedicated to wootar16 who seems to love SALEX with a passion. Hope you like.**

**Chapter one: childish adults.**

"Hey you, Sean, who the hell do you, think you are?" Alex asked walking back in the safe house in frustration.

"Oh, hey devil wears Prada, nice seeing you here"

"Nikita why is this jerk here?" Alex asked a smirking nikita who was cradled up against Michael's chest in the living room couch.

"We need him in the next couple of weeks, I asked him to come" nikita explained.

"Fool why'd you flat my car tires for?" Alex asked knowingly. Her car was fine up until Sean came and no one else gets to her more or less than he does.

"Oh, yeah my drive here was very nice, the cab driver ripped me because I didn't let him see my packs and he beat the crap out of me then robbed me" Sean sarcastically said sitting with a glass of water from across of a smiling Michael and nikita remembering the déjà vu moment.

"Answer my question or I'll be the one beating the crap out of you right now for real, first time you came here, you spilled oil on my phone and made a mess out of my room with paper towel, then you broke my car window and now you just flattened my car tires, seriously what the heck is your problem?!" Alex asked ignoring any sarcasm or sense of humor.

Throughout the whole scene and argument, Michael, nikita and birkoff were observing with smirks on their faces laughing at the awkward sexual looks they were glancing at each other and the childish role they were playing.

"Wait, you seriously want me to answer that?" Sean asked now briefly looking into Alex's blue green watered Chanel eyes.

"Dude?..." Alex said warningly.

"I don't like you and I don't trust you, you're crazy, you got under my skin way too much back in the place from hell and now I'm giving you the price of your money. I'll show you evil childish Sean putting the navy seal behind just for a while" he said getting up and making his way to the kitchen with Alex following shortly behind.

"First, you are going to replace the phone which you spilled oil on, then you're taking my car to the garage to get my window and tires fixed but before that, I'll show you a hint of how I get when I go crazy, clearly you still haven't met me yet" Alex said with a fake smirk on her face

Before Sean could make sense of her last sentence, surprisingly, a fist was thrown up his chin, banging his head on the fridge, Alex reached for the mop and broke it in half, swiping his legs, he was fast on the floor with Alex hitting him really hard with the wooden mop, flipping him over on his stomach Alex pinned his arms up against his back and he had no time to react to any of her hits "And how you like me now?" Alex reached his ears and whispered.

"Shit, what are you Russians bitches made out of, rock, woods, seriously?" Sean said and winced in pain trying to free himself from Alex's strong grips.

"Keep getting on my last nerves and I'll be damn thrilled to show you" Alex said "… and don't you ever mess with me, I want my car good as new that means everything fixed pronto" she finished and back slapped his head before loosened up her hold on him and walking away.

"Argh, bitch, I hate you so much, be glad I don't hit women and that nikita would shoot me if I do anything to you!" Sean yelled after Alex who was living for her room while supporting himself with the kitchen counter struggling to get up off the mosaic cold marble floor.

From the top of the stairs, Alex flashed Sean the middle finger and a victorious smile then stunk her tongue out.

With a fake disgusted look on his face he shouted ("You ugly!") Loud enough for her to hear.

Before Sean or Alex could start any verbal arguments again they heard three different mocking laughs "You guys are fucking twelve" nikita said in between laughter after watching the whole scene.

"No jokes, I wonder if you guys even passed the age of five" Michael agreed and the computer genius nerd was still poorly dying laughing.

"I hate all of you!" Sean shouted and went back to the kitchen to find ice packs for his now bruised face, legs and arms.

**Okay this stupid idea came to me at like the middle of the night and I just went with it. Sorry for any misspelled words. Thank you and I hope you like, review and let me know your thoughts. It'll get better.**


	2. deja vu

**I do not own nikita.**

**Chapter two: déjà vu**

"We're going out there on the field and you guys better get it together before anyone gets shot" nikita said over the phone to alex while in the car with Michael driving to their mission's destination point.

"Don't tell me that; tell him" Alex said speaking of Sean.

"Look I don't care how much you two hate each other just be careful" nikita said and hanged up the phone.

She shook her head "These two are like the déjà vu of us" nikita told Michael who smiled.

/

Once again the mission went as plan. They always do the best job together out on the field. They went home happy that they saved an innocent person from one of Percy's evil mind games.

Over dinner they were all at the table, like a perfect normal family eating dinner and having a wonderful night.

"Hey, jerk pass down the salad" Alex poked Sean and clapped. Sean kept eating his lasagna and nikita smiled.

"Okay fine, Sean please pass down the salad" Alex said in a sweet fake voice causing birkoff to smirk and murmur something in her ears.

"Now you're talking to me. Here" Sean said and passes down the bowl of salad to Alex.

"Thanks jerk" Alex snorted

"Welcome she-devil"

"Oh shut up!" Alex shouted.

"I thought so" Sean said with an amused smirk.

These two were the entertainment of the night. Michael and nikita would just watch with amusing smirks and smiles on their faces because most the things they say or do were a déjà vu moment for them.

After dinner they all thanked nikita and Alex for dinner then cleaned the dishes. They went over their next mission and then ended up on the couches deciding to just hang out for the rest of the night.

They talked about fun things, old memories that Michael and nikita shared with them during their times in division together and some of them were funny some were sad and other just left them with stunned look on their faces.

"Can I ask you two a question?" nikita asked pointing her fingers at both Alex and Sean who were sitting next to each other.

"Yeah" they both said in unison and shot each other a dirty glance.

"Why do you guys fight?" nikita carefully asked waiting anxiously for an answer.

The room grew silent and the silence was intense. All looking at each other waiting for an answer either from Alex or Sean.

"I… I don't know" Alex said breaking the silent. She truly didn't know why she fought Sean or curse at him and she felt ridiculous.

"My guess is that we fight because we can't have sex" Sean calmly said after a few seconds of silence. All eyes fixed on him then both Michael and nikita burst into laughter

"Okay goodbye I'm done with you two" nikita said dragging Michael down the hall where their room was with his arms wrapped around her waist and trailing soft kisses behind her neck making her moan and laugh.

"Night mikita people and please keep it quiet tonight. The shadow walker needs sleep too" birkoff shouted after them living Alex and Sean alone in the living room.

"We fight because of what?" Alex asked still stunned by his previous answer for that same question.

"You heard me" Sean said in a serious tone and skipped to his room leaving Alex more confused than ever.

/

**Thought. Hate? Like? Leave me a review.**


	3. are we together or not?

**Hey I'm back! Thanks for the kind review and thanks for reading! Nikita returns in less than 2 weeks I'm freaking excited. Okay and this chapter have a little mikita in it so forgive me but then I know you love them too.**

**Are we together or not?**

"Ahhhhhh, oh god!" Sean screamed when he opened his eyes to see himself patched up in bed with Alex which he considers his worst nightmare next to him.

At first alex got scared when he screamed but then burst into laughter when she realize why he had screamed "Well rise and shine sleeping beauty" alex said with a smirk as she closes the magazine she was reading.

"What happened? Where is everyone else? Why are you here?" Sean asked at once without taking a breath causing Alex to roll her eyes. Was he suddenly scared of her? Alex thought.

"You got shot remember? Nikita and Michael are out saving the world as their voicemail said and as in to what am doing here, well you needed a nursemaid so yeah… unless you wanted birkoff or Ryan or Owen" alex teased.

"That's really bad; really very bad" Sean spoke in a stoned voice which made Alex blush. What the hell was he doing? Ever since that night after dinner everything he does seemed to have an effect on her.

"Do you want water or something to drink or eat" alex asked trying to change the awkward tension around them.

"Yeah, you would be nice to have"

"Oh, I'm… I'm afraid I'm not on the menu"

Why the heck was she getting speechless all of the sudden?

As she got up to get him a glass of water and some painkillers birkoff came annoying her "You know if you two want I can give you some privacy?" he whispered in her ears.

Well that's just great. Even birkoff notice. She thought

"Well he just got shot and is high on anti-Tylenol and painkillers drugs so we can understand why he's being all weird" Alex said in annoyance.

"Are you sure?" birkoff asked as the little stubborn annoying hacker he was.

"Nerd maybe you should cut off on some of those energy drinks. Just saying" Alex said trying to push his buttons but it wasn't working apparently. Not now at least.

"Mhmmm…." Birkoff said and went back to his computer or baby shadow walker as he likes to call it to the sound of a beeping alert on their next target for upcoming missions.

Alex gave sean the painkillers and in a few minutes he was out like a light.

Couple hours later nikita and Michael called telling them they succeeded as always and was on their way back home.

Sean woke up a few minutes after that to find alex with a tray of food and orange juice for him to eat. Maybe getting shot was worth it. He liked that she was taking good care of him for some weird reason or maybe not as weird. There was a possibility he was really falling for her. Like they say, most relationships start with hate.

Alex smiled at him, glad he was awake at the right time.

"Hi" he said

"Hi, glad you're awake. You need to eat something; you must be starving to death." alex said helping him to a sitting comfortable position.

"Thank you" he murmured.

He ate his food. It was healthy and delicious and he felt a lot better after that too. Glad to have a good nurse like her, he couldn't find words to thank her. Even though most of the time they were cat and mouse, he appreciated the sensitive gesture

"I don't know how to thank you alex… I really don't" he said after alex took the empty tray of food and put it on the glass table near her.

She smiled a mesmerizing smile "Well you can just say thank you alex for taking care of me"

Actually, he had a way better idea to show his gratitude against her and by surprise he caught her in a beautiful, wet, passionate kiss. Time slowed down for them. It's almost like they were both yearning for this moment. And they were. Shouting the world off and focusing only in their kiss, not a single sound disturbed them as they drown more and more into each other but unfortunately for the nerd he had to witness that. He wasn't angry or lonely like he would be if it was Michael and nikita. He was rather happy and made a turn back to his computer deciding against spoiling the moment.

Both pulling away for oxygen, they looked into each other's eyes as if all the answers to their equation was in there, both smiling sean thanked her by repeating those same exact words she implied before everything changed "Thank you alex for taking absolute good care of me"

"You're very welcome" she replied before letting herself be pulled into a tight warm hug.

Nikita and Michael walked in what they call their home. Hand in hand exhausted but happy. Something different was happening; alex and sean were having a normal conversation for once without fighting. What was strange though was that they were smiling. Okay well that was impossible and against nature in their book. She definitely wanted to get informed and the only person that might know will be the nerd.

Nikita squeezed Michael's hand for assurance to go to shower if he wishes without her before she walked to birkoff's computer.

"What did I miss?" nikita said pointing to the newly couple's direction.

"Let's just say that they had a little kissy moment" the nerd said with a funny smile.

"They kissed?!" nikita screamed and before she knew it, she was skipping stairs to find Michael.

"Michael… Michael… Michael come on… let's go downstairs" she started jumping up and down like a five year old spoiled girl. Michael had no idea what was wrong with his girlfriend but he didn't complain. He just brought his shirtless self downstairs.

"I won!" nikita simply said in excitement.

"Hun what are you talking about?" Michael asked completely lost. He was tired and he couldn't make himself think.

"The bait we had about Alex and sean getting together… they kissed and I won-… nikita said still in excitement. She just liked it when she was proved right.

Michael's eyes lit up at the revelation. Well that's a shocker. Stuff like this was only for him and nikita. They fight then get together "No they didn't. You're lying"

Nikita sight "Nerd for the love of god… would you please tell Michael because I want my hot bath, my massage and my $100… and something else that is none of your business" nikita winked.

"Erh… okay" birkoff gave her the 'I don't want to know anyways' look "Mike she won okay. As much as it's hard to believe it happened"

"Why did they have to kiss? I was so looking forward for you to be my little slave for a whole week" Michael said as he reached for his wallet and handed nikita $500. As she saw the $400 bonus, she smiled "It was nice doing business with you" nikita said as she took the money.

"Just say it already. Your smile is making me feel guilty" Michael pouted.

"I told you so" there it was said. She did tell him that would eventually happen but she too didn't expect it to be so soon.

"I love you" Michael said as she pulled nikita in for a hug.

"I love you too babe" nikita whispered and reached Michael's ears "can I get my hot bath with my man too"

Michael smiled "As you wish beautiful"

"Such a tease" she said as Michael grabbed her by the waist leading her to their room.

"Do you think they know?" alex asked sean

"I don't think so" sean answered with a wide grin on his lips

"So how is this going to be? Are we together or not? What's our next step" Sean asked. Those questions were to be asked after what happened because obviously their actions took on effects and things were about to get a lot more complicated.

**This chapter is longer than the other ones as you can see. I hope I reached your expectation but next chapter be ready to expect the unexpected because things are going to get very shitty. Believe that. Leave me a comment and tell me how I did. Erh… just a reminder again Nikita comes back in a few weeks.**


	4. doubt and closure

**Sorry for the wait everybody! Been busy and now I'm back in the game! In this chapter alex is more confused than ever and nikita is sort of there for her helping her getting through, then alex and sean have a talk with sean**

**~ Doubt and closure**

It has been a week since sean got shot, a week since alex took care of him, a week since they kissed and a week since things got ten times more awkward between them. At this point, alex didn't know what to do, she had kissed him and it was a heartwarming feeling but now she didn't know if she could manage this relationship with sean because all the relationships she's ever been in got fucked over. She had the baddest luck when it came to relationships.

She looked puzzled, confused, she was over thinking everything and sean gave her space, but space wasn't what she really needed.

"Alex…?" nikita called, she was observing the girl closely, she knew exactly what was going on in her mind, and she is a genius at reading people. She was that, been that and done that and it always ended up putting her in a bad situation and she didn't want that for alex.

"Yeah?" Alex responded.

"Come on… let's go for a walk, we need a talk, at least I know you do." Nikita said.

They both changed to new clothes, nikita kissed Michael and told him she was heading out with alex and she'll be back to cook dinner soon.

They got to the beach; they sat near the water just looking at the water as the sunset down.

"So… you and sean?" nikita said as if waiting for more detail from alex.

"Yeah, as you know, he kissed me, I kissed him back now it's all weird because I don't know if I can do this" alex said.

Nikita knew exactly what alex meant, she understood because once upon a time that was her, everything with alex was like a déjà vu of herself "Do you love him?" she asked.

"Does it matter if I do?" alex said, at this point, she had tears in her eyes, she was losing it so she laid her hands on nikita's legs for support and nikita gladly squeezed her hand telling her it is going to be just fine.

"It's okay alex… you can tell me anything, what's really bothering you honey?" nikita gave her hand another squeeze, she wanted to be there for the girl.

"I… am not the kind of girl who can be in a relationship. Every relationships I've ever been in was complete chaos, I always end up hurting the person I love, first with Thom, then with Nathan. I just don't want to hurt him too nikita. Even though I have beat the living hell out of him like a million times, even though he's annoying at times, arrogant, an ass and childish as hell, I just don't want to hurt him emotionally like I have previously done before. To top that, I can never be you or Michael…" alex said, she was hyperventilating, sobbing, she needed to take a deep breath. Even that wouldn't make everything perfect.

Nikita felt sad for the girl, she has been through a lot at a young age and she deserved to be happy "Hey, alex look at me" nikita said.

She slowly lift her head up and looked into nikita's eyes "…sean is not Thom…or Nathan, just because the other two didn't work out or end up the way you would of wanted it don't mean this one would be the same and you're right, you can't be me or Michael because you have to be better… so don't let this chance you got go to waste because I did that for five years and it hurt more than I thought it would. Talk to Sean, tell him how you feel, see if he's on the same page you are and if he is that's good" nikita said "It's worth taking the shot, it's worth fighting for… remember you once told me that"

Alex smiled, she loved having nikita being there for her "What would I do without you?" she said.

Nikita paused to compose something that would make Alex laugh "…your life would be miserable and boring without me in it" nikita said and the Russian beauty did laugh.

"I mean really nikita… I love you, I mean like a sister of course, if it was otherwise Michael would start to worry" Alex joked.

Nikita was glad she was able to joke and relax "Oh yes he would worry, like a lot and besides that wouldn't happen, sex is too good with Michael… but it's not a secret that I love you too right?" nikita said. Alex rolled her eyes.

They spent a couple minutes just laughing, enjoying their sister time until "Okay, I hate ruining the moment but we need to go back now, I miss my boyfriend" nikita said.

Alex chuckled then got up and helped nikita up "You two are too…connected!" she said.

Oh yes, that's what makes sex great between us" nikita whispered "You should try it!" she added.

"Oh eww shake my head" Alex said.

They walked to the house laughing together, this mood was much better.

"Nerd!" nikita called "Where's my boyfriend?" she asked

Birkoff came with a bag of chips and a can of red bull "What? Don't talk to me woman, I'm fucking hungry!" he said

Nikita laughed and smacked the back of his head "I'm going to cook something 'healthy' for dinner"

"Nikki… no offense but 'healthy' for you is a lot of green vegetables… which I love NOT!" birkoff said.

"You mean, worse than you eating chips and red bulls all day?" nikita teased.

"I want bacon bitch!" birkoff shouted before he went back playing video games

"Michael I'm here!" Nikita shouted

Michael descended the stairs to help nikita in the kitchen with dinner. When he got there he sweetly pecked her lips.

Meanwhile alex was Sean's front door, debating on whether or not she should knock or just go help nikita with dinner. She knocked expecting Sean to be asleep or something, when suddenly she heard "Come in!"

She slowly pushed the door open "Are you busy?" Alex asked

"Nope, just flipping with through the channels hoping to find something entertaining but nothing is on" Sean said.

"Great, because we need to have a serious conversation!" Alex said

**Yeah so basically that's it. Sorry if this was more based on nalex or alkita than salex. Next chapter I promise salex but for now, it's what it is… hope you liked! Reviews make me happy!**


	5. the talk

**Hey salex fans, I know Owen might be pissing you off so here's a new chapter! I own nothing.**

**~The Talk**

"There is something I need you to know first before we go any further in what little relationship we might have" alex said.

Sean turned off the television o he could give alex his full attention

"I'm listening" he said.

""I don't want to hurt you. I'm not a lucky girl when it comes to relationships. Most of the relationships I've been in ended badly and I really don't want it to be the same with you" Alex said.

"Want to talk about it. Maybe you won't hurt me if you get closure" Sean said.

"Yeah, my first boyfriend was also my drug dealer, I thought he had loved me but he didn't, I was a drug addict and a sex slave. The relationship was mostly us using each other. I was his money maker and sex slave he was the person I came to when I needed drugs. He used to beat me. Most dysfunctional relationships I've ever been in. when nikita found me, she got me clean and she trained me I went after him and I killed him, which was the end of my first relationship" Alex explained. Sean was looking at her with a sympathetic and face look on his face.

"Then what happened with the second one?" he asked

"The second one, his name was tom; I met him during my time in division. He was the only nice person to me besides Michael in my time with division. I guessed he started having feeling for me. Nikita had thought me all the rules there were in division and not falling in love was one of them. I figured if he liked me, I could use him but I started having feeling for him too. Once at a mission, nikita got captured by division and I had to break her out, so I bombed division and tom found out I was nikita's mole. I couldn't risk getting canceled because at that time I had one and only obsession; get revenge for my family's death so I shot him and made it seem like he was the mole and that was my first kill for division. Nikita has been my only strength, she has helped me in ways I thought nobody could, she believed in me when I didn't believe in myself and I hope you know I'd do anything for her. I put her before anything I have in my life and she is a sister I never had." Alex said. This conversation was getting too emotional. Sean too had little teary eyes, not because he was a softie but because he didn't know how emotionally and physically strong Alex was until now. She is someone very precious and amazing.

"Was there a third one too?" Sean asked which made Alex laughed a little.

"Yes there was." Alex responded.

"Let me guess? You shot him too?" he joked. Alex playfully smacked him.

"Actually no, his name was Nathan, I met him in my apartment building when I graduated to an agent I was to act normal, he was my next door neighbor. He was a DJ so when I first met him, he invited me to a party he was doing at his place. I was hesitant but then I changed my mind so I went, that night I ended up beating the crap out of a drunk dude and he was somehow impressed" alex paused.

"Keep going, what happened?" Sean asked.

"I'm getting there!" Alex said with a chuckle.

"Couple months passed and we have gotten used to the habit of inviting each other over for dinner, I knew I wasn't suppose to have any relationships with civilians but somehow it felt normal and our friendship became more than what it was suppose to be. When division found out I was having a relationship they wanted to cancel him, so nikita helped me erase any evidence of him so they wouldn't send some cleaner and do the same thing they did to Daniel. Nikita's ex" alex said. Now she was crying. Going back to those memories made her feel grossed by herself. What kind of monster was she?

Sean passed her the box of tissue and she took one to wipe her tears away

"Then what?" Sean kept pushing it. He wanted to know everything. He wanted to make sure he was different from those other guy and not break her heart.

"Then he found out I was trained to be an assassin by a secret unit of the government called division as you know, thanks to this girl named Jaden. She came to my apartment one morning and he was there so she figured why not rat me out, life is too friendly with you now a day's why not just ruin everything. This girl hated my guts because I knew everything about division because nikita had trained me to be the best I can be and I was the only one Michael liked because for some reasons I was like nikita in some ways, but little did he know, nikita trained me to be like her. Anyways, we got into an argument, Jaden tried to kill me and we fought for a while when she was about to shoot me, Nathan noticed and shot her first. He saved my life that day and since then, I made him disappear with new identities and enough money to live a normal life with nikita's help of course. Until now as we speak, I never heard from him; don't know where he is or how his life turned out. I don't want to know either. He is better off without me" Alex finished. She was pouring her heart out, and honestly it felt great rather than bad. She's never talked about this with anyone and it was a great lift of weight.

Sean hugged her to his chest and kissed her hair as he whispered "I'm sorry you had to go through so much. I had no idea, you're something special Alex" he said.

"What am trying to say is that I don't want you to get hurt or end up like the others. I care about you and going through that again would just be my biggest nightmare. So now that you know, I got the closure I needed to move on and I'd say let's take everything step and see where it goes" Alex implied.

"I want you to know something too; you don't have to be scared because I'm not anything like your exes. I'm different and I could and would NEVER do anything to hurt you Alex. You can still beat me though but I'll survive" he tried to lighten the mood.

Alex smiled a genuine smile. He very understanding of her even though most time he is a jerk "Okay, if you say so. Let's just hope we can work out what little relationship we have" she said.

"Promise?" Sean raised his eyebrows.

"Yes" Alex answered. She kissed him on the lips softly then pulled away "Just so you're not having any doubts" she said.

Sean smirked, and then pulled her face back to his and slowly, their lips met in another long, intense, irresistible passionate kiss.

**Dan dun, finally I'm finished! Please review. Hoped you had fun reading it! **


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